A Rut

So, I recently went to the audition for Clayton Community Theatre's presentation of "Lysistrata" and after waiting for a couple days, I heard that not enough people showed up for the first 2 auditions so the company wanted to hold 2 more auditions. Well, the day before the last audition, I asked the director out of curiosity what the rehearsal schedule was going to be like. My boss had just put out the October schedule and it had me down to work a good deal since one of my co-workers decided to quit and join the Air Force without giving any notice (I do hope that he matures somewhat if he wants to be a good soldier) and my boss still hasn't hired anyone new. Which means, my month of October is pretty full just with work. I don't mind it or anything, I'm happy about the money, but when I talked to the director about the schedule she said that she was hoping for 4-5 nights a week of rehearsal.

Hey, if I had a day job that went from 9-5, I would still do the show but 4-5 nights a week with a full-time work schedule on top of it (with hours from 10AM to 9PM) makes the possibility of doing the show nonexistent. 3 nights a week, I could have worked out but no more than that. It's weird, I didn't have that much rehearsal in a week for any of the professional companies that I have been a part of. I guess it's been awhile since I did community theatre...


But I talked to the director and told her what was up, that there was no way that I would be able to do the show with a full time schedule that had me set to work most nights. Truthfully, if I had known before my boss made the new schedule, I could have probably swung it but because enough people didn't show up, it pushed that back and made it impossible to request the time off. The director totally understood and said that she looks forward to being able to work with me at some point and I do as well. It's such a shame though, she told me that I was cast at Lysistrata, a part that I have wanted to play for quite some time, a part that I KNOW I would be so good at.

As much as it pained me though, I needed to be responsible and back out before the final audition. The director appreciated that I gave her enough time still.

I'm just going through a bit of a rut. I can't just sit still and I have a feeling though I will need to constantly keep myself busy for the rest of my life. I've been worried about the future. I want so much from life, I demand it. I would like to have a career that I enjoy and would be happy with until I was able to retire. I still would like to do theatre but I'm not moving to California like I thought I would. I met a man and fell in love and now I want to be with him forever, marry him and be happy. Granted, that isn't my only goal in life but it's a big one. He's a big part of my life. And I know that if we went to California, we'd be stressing out over money, he'd be upset about moving away from his family and our friends (as would I), and truthfully, I realized that I don't want to do film anymore. It was a whim, a swift flash of a dream, and I'm much happier with stage. I KNOW stage.

I would like to look into becoming a psychiatrist or counselor. I believe I would be very good at it. I just need to act upon this goal now. I've never been good at beginnings, I don't know where to start or even how.

While I'm a little upset that I turned down the role that I wanted, I have to remember that it was for the best.

Jesus Unions

Oh, Debbie Does Dallas: The Musical. I hate to say it but I actually kind of miss you, with your up-beat crazy cheers, and your sweaty bananas. Doesn't sound very appetizing, huh? It wasn't, and yet it was still fun. But that was close to last year already. I'm terrible about keeping up with ..well, just about everything. Still, I always come back. 

It's very easy for an actor to know where he/she was at any given point in any given year. Life becomes defined by seasons, shows, theatres. After Debbie, I moved on to inhabit the theatre space being rented by R-S Theatrics. The space was in Crestwood Mall (they are in the process of tearing the mall down currently) and it was..cozy, for lack of better word. A small dark space, shrouded in black curtains, with the audience practically sharing the stage (floor section) with the performers, yet with a decent light system; the R-S space was humble and modest but it still did what it was supposed to do. 

The show was Jesus Hopped the A-Train, written by Stephen Adly Guirgis, and the character was Maryjane Hanrahan. I was so excited to play that part, I was personally invited to audition, along with a couple other candidates who are both very good actors. The script was, I feel, well-written but full of 2 page long monologues. I think the longest monologue I had was given to me before the audition and was over three pages. I tape recorded that particular one and played it over and over so I would have a better shot at getting the part. The rehearsal process was alright, not my favorite experience but not bad. It didn't help that the green room was freezing. But mostly I think it was because I just didn't have the character. Every rehearsal, I felt sadder and more frustrated because I felt like myself, not Maryjane. The director kept reassuring me that I was where she wanted me but I didn't feel it and it cast a horrible shadow over rehearsals. I was nervous to go and attempt to perform when I clearly wasn't any good. "Nobody would buy it," I thought. The thought of reviewers coming out and sitting almost on top of me and watching intently, scrutinizing, jotting down notes in note pads every few minutes only to glance up again or re-position themselves ... it depressed me. 

And of course, it wasn't something I admitted. One, because I didn't want people to think I cared about what reviewers say (though in all actuality, I do. I need validation.) and two, because I didn't want people to know that I clearly wasn't in character if I noticed that Judith Newmark whispered to Bob Wilcox or that Mark Bretz changed his seating position. Of course, it's especially difficult not to notice these things when, like I said before, the audience is just a couple feet away from you and you're delivering your lines to the audience. I had no problem at all when I was in the scenes with other performers and paid no attention the silent spectators. 

All in all, I'm glad I was a part of it. I wasn't incredibly familiar with Crestwood Mall because, like everyone else, I didn't really care to visit it. I did a childrens theatre skit with Greg Matzker's company a couple years ago there and I also saw the amazing, stupendous, spectacularly funny show, Cannibal: The Musical, at Crestwood Mall when Brian and Suki Peters independently produced it on stage. I do not exaggerate in my descriptive words for the show, it was truly a blast. It made all of the problems in my life just melt away into hilarity and I thank the cast and crew for that. 

During my stint as Maryjane Hanrahan in "Jesus", I was asked to be a part of the Hot City Play Reading Festival. Shaun Sheley was directing one of the shows and I was honored to be a part of it. I knew Shaun from Lindenwood University (You see? Connections make a huge difference.) and I knew his style. I went by very quickly, it was only for one weekend, but the cast was fun and I was happy to be involved. The guy who played "Angel" was also doing the Hot City Festival with me so we carpooled a lot. Some days we had both rehearsals and would just drive directly from one to the other. As much of a pain as it was, it was fun.

After "Jesus", I took a little break. At the time of the show, I had started a short-lived employment period at Dillard's, standing behind the poorly cleaned perfume counters. I won't go into detail simply because I choose not to waste time displaying my displeasure with the store but let's just say that due to a supervisor (who is no longer employed by the company...gee, that's too bad), my job didn't last long due to my own volition. 

Also, during this time I developed a bit of a care-free attitude. After all, it was nearing the end of the year and I didn't really have much to show for it. I had broken up with my boyfriend in the beginning of December when I realized that the relationship just hadn't developed over the course of a year and nine months. While it was upsetting to discover, I'm grateful that I did because I realized that I just wasn't happy. However, I digress. Why not just relax and enjoy sliding into 2012? I went out a lot with friends, ready to just enjoy friendship and have fun. I went to many Karaoke nights at a pub in Dogtown called Felix's. I went to numerous Christmas parties, a "White Elephant" party, and a New Year's Eve party. It was at Felix's one night that a man caught my attention. And he held it. I couldn't stop watching him make a complete fool of himself, singing karaoke ("I'm Just A Gigolo"), and dancing with some girls while others all around were singing with him, clapping and whooping. I won't go into it much, I'll save that for my other blog that isn't about the theatre but this man means so much to me. His name is Max and he is also an actor. We have been in a relationship since New Year's Eve, 2011, and we will be moving in together next month. So needless to say, it's going very well. :)

In the early spring, I began working at a waitress at The Drunken Fish sushi bar/restaurant but didn't even last as long as Dillard's. Yes, it was THAT bad of an experience. And before you judge and assume that I'm just nit-picky, I tried. I actually tried very hard to make a go of that place but I am convinced that there is just no pleasing those people and I'd advise anyone considering a position at that establishment (any one of their locations) to run fast in the other direction. I will not post any certain experiences because I like to think I am better than that, but please, just take my word for it.

During this time, I was contacted via email by a director named Bonnie Black Taylor. She was directing a scene that was to be presented in the St. Louis Briefs Festival; a festival of short lesbian and gay plays. She mentioned that she originally had cast someone else but that they would be unable to do it so, upon hearing my name referenced by a couple good friends of hers (and coincidentally, mine), she contacted me. Not only was I incredibly happy to have been contacted, I also didn't have to audition. She wanted to know if I could start rehearsals right away and off we went. There were only two other actors in the scene, an older black woman who was deceptively young looking, and a beefed up black man with the sweetest face and disposition you could ever hope to encounter. I can't remember the name of the woman but the mans name is Robert Lee Davis. We met for my first rehearsal at Robert's apartment but he warned us that if he got a call, he would have to leave. You see, Robert is an actual cop (he also played one in the scene) and he was on duty that night. We had barely started to rehearse when a voice from his communicator called out something. Robert apologized and got up fast (along with his partner who had been watching us silently from the kitchen area) and they left in a rush. Some time passed (we kept rehearsing, Bonnie read for Robert) and Robert eventually came back from whatever crime was being committed. We began from Roberts cue and everything was hunky-dory but soon enough, he got a call again and dashed out with his silent partner. I noticed that the director was really watching what the other woman and I were doing during the scene (we NEEDED to have chemistry since we were playing a lesbian couple). I remember really liking the writing and the characters and I was excited about it. Finally, rehearsal ended and Robert was still out. His wife had come home and was getting ready for bed so we let ourselves out. Unfortunately, I left something in the apartment (or maybe Bonnie did, I can't remember) and soon enough it was just the two of us in the room. She asked me what I thought about the other woman and if I felt anything, any chemistry between us. Honestly, I felt like there could be chemistry there, that she could be the type to intrigue me (and my character) but Bonnie admitted that she couldn't feel it between us. It wasn't too long after that I received an email from Bonnie, addressed to both Robert and myself, saying that she had let the woman go, having compensated her for her time, and will be bringing on someone new. That is how I met Wendy Renee, a wonderfully believable actor with a lovely complexion and a great and personable attitude. It was truly a treat to work with both Wendy and Robert. We, as a cast, had such energy and we were told many times that we all "clicked". There was a lot of improv rehearsals in which Wendy, Robert, and myself made up skits and bits and let the characters take over which I do really think helped out and made us understand the characters more (though it started to become a bit excessive and I didn't want to do improv some nights). But the Briefs Festival was a big success and, it being the first LGBT theatre festival that St. Louis has ever seen, it was like being a part of history.

Next came my very first Equity produced show, "The New Century", written by Paul Rudnick. I had auditioned for the company (Max & Louie Productions) twice in December of 2011 and was not originally cast in either show though I was happy to have made callbacks to both. In March, 2012, I received a phone message from the director of TNC, Ted Gregory, whom I had worked under at Lindenwood University. His message said that due to scheduling issues, the girl who was originally cast would not be able to do the show and he wanted to know if I was still available. Well, of course I jumped at the chance! I called him back immediately and everything was set. I began rehearsals about a week after accepting the part. Now I can tell you, "The New Century" was not my favorite show. I had trouble with the character, mainly. I mean, I have a tendency to read and perform characters honestly and sincerely. I have been told many times that I am a very believable actor. Yet, I couldn't seem to get the character of Joann down. She seemed almost cartoonish and two dimensional at times and I wasn't sure of it. Plus, the writing was just so bizarre at times that it didn't help. I mean, the character of Mr. Charles turns my baby gay by pointing his fingers at it and making a buzzing sound. Not only that but I didn't really understand what the director wanted from me, from Joann. I would get one idea and then, the next night, get another that contradicted the first. It drove my to such stress that I would feel like crying (and followed through with the whim sometimes). After all, it was my first Equity show and I wanted to be good. Better than good! I was playing with the big boys now! But no matter how hard and long I thought about Joann, I just couldn't pin her down. I received good reviews, decent ones anyway, but I still don't feel that happy about it. My baby doll got a great laugh when he was revealed in the final scene, totally "gay" and dressed like a cupcake with a bad hair piece. I joked around backstage, "I'm being upstaged by a plastic doll!"

But "The New Century" came to a close on May 20, 2012 and it's on to the next thing. But first, a little break is in order. After all, my life is changing. A new boyfriend, a new apartment (with said boyfriend), and new kind of relationship that I have not yet experienced. A vacation in Florida is also coming up. Oh, and I'm currently working at The Back Store and enjoying the sales experience. So all in all, life is good.

New Revelations and Occurences

I realize that I haven't written in quite a while, it seems like I always tell myself internally "Don't forget!" but I get so busy. I suppose I shouldn't complain, it could be worse but a few things happened since I last posted.

I was honored by the Kirkwood Theatre Guild with an award for my part in Blithe Spirit (Edith). A crew member titled it "The Demolition Ball Award" because I had no problem with throwing my whole body into the swinging doors that we used in that show. The bruises had healed about a month or two after that show but it was worth it and I was incredibly happy to receive such acknowledgment. (Pictures will be up soon ... hopefully)
 

I also performed in Lindenwood University's production of Chess. It was at the Bellville, Ill. campus and was quite a drive but I think it was a good experience and worth it. I made a lot of new friends, it was the only cast that I've been in lately where I didn't know almost anyone in the beginning. I was feeling terrible about myself up until the second week of performances because I wasn't doing as well as I wanted to. My singing wasn't strong enough, or so I thought. During rehearsals at the theatre building (we would alternate between two places for rehearsals), I would sing my song and get so frustrated and upset because it didn't sound as good as I felt it should be. I would walk offstage and the second I was hidden behind the curtains I would walk to the other side of the stage left wing and just cry against the wall. Most of the time a very nice larger man who was also in the cast, would see me crying in the dark and come over to give me a hug and tell me what he thought about the song that night. Just thinking about it makes me smile now but at the time I was so depressed. The biggest thing that I really appreciated about this guy was that he would be honest with me and tell me where I went flat and if I sounded better than I thought or if I was just fair.

Opening night of the show came around inevitably and I noticed the main techie (a friend of mine from a past show) and one of the lead men in the show would sneak off to have a little drinkie before they called "places!" and I asked if I could join them. Now, I'm not one to drink and I know what is too much and what is just right so I always used my best judgement on that but from the first night on until the curtains closed on Chess, I would take a drink before the show started. It really helped me loosen up and stop worrying as much. The first weekened, I would fret before going on stage and would start my song off a bit wobbly but would clear my mind during the song and just continue. By the time the second weekend started, I would clear my mind before stepping on stage and everything was perfect after that. I'm not saying that I had a fantastic voice in the show, but I definitely didn't embarrass myself. My singing teacher and his wife, my boyfriend and his mom and a few friends from the theatre world came all during the last show. They all told me how proud they were of me, that my song was fantastic and that the emotion I injected into my song was wonderful. I won't say I'm a singer still because I have a LOT to learn but I'm not afraid to sing anymore.


I've been taking singing lessons with a new teacher and have been learning a lot though I'm too hard on myself and I realize that I need to stop that. One thing I learned is that my voice covers 3 octaves and I'm what is known as a coloratura soprano but my range is capable of going all the way down to contralto.
According to june-anderson.com, "One of the rarest voice categories, Dramatic Coloraturas literally are a breed apart. Their singing is characterized by the ability to sing with agility while utilizing a dramatic soprano voice, with the all volume and power that entails."

A contralto is the deepest female classical singing voice so I have quite a range. Now I just need to learn how to use it better.

Aside fom webseries shoots for BlackBookBerry and another episode of Pokemon Pals, I've been in rehearsal for Debbie Does Dallas: The Musical. It goes up April 4th and runs through the 20th so we only have a week left before the show. Now that we're headed into tech week, I'm really going to have to watch my meals and not eat in between. I also need to go shopping for a new bra and panties for this show.

I'm hoping to audition for Oedipus Rex or Antigone after this so that will be quite a jump. However, I do need to get this bloody math class out of the way this fall in order to obtain my actual degree. Stupid math...

August 4 - 20th at the Regional Arts Commision in the Delmar Loop, St. Louis, MO

"If You Like My Angel, Dear, You're Gonna Love My Devil, Darlin'"

Sorry for the lapse of silence, my life has been a hectic yet fun one as of late and I never found the time to post anything.

I went to my first Arts for Life Best Performance Awards yesterday and had a blast. Not to mention, I had the most gorgeous dress, I look forward to donning it again. The thing is, I was just about to give up my search for a dress to wear and decided to stop in Macy’s for some black elbow length gloves and saw the dress snuggly displayed on a headless mannequin and couldn’t take my eyes off of it. The sales woman was very nice and when I went to ask her opinion after I had it on, she was very sweet and I felt I could trust her opinion so I ended up buying it, even though it was a little more than I was hoping to pay. Why is it that nothing is ever on sale when you’re actually looking?

But I had a great time, everywhere I looked I saw friends and those whom I didn’t know, I soon got to meet. The awards ceremony was wonderful; my darling Ryan won the award for Best Comedic Actor thanks to his “Carmen Ghia” (The Producers) and Jen Theby won the award for Best Lead Actress due to her "Flaemmchen” (Grand Hotel: The Musical). While Grand Hotel didn’t receive the award for best large ensemble, The Producers did and I believe they fully deserved to, they all put on such an incredible show. It’s one of those occurrences where I would love to watch the show again (same cast, same everything) but all I can do is attempt to play it over in my mind. It’s the same with Evil Dead: The Musical (also starring my sweetheart).

I was a little disappointed that Bob Wilcox, one of the reviewers in St. Louis, wasn’t there; he gave me some great reviews recently and I wanted to show my face. It was nice to see my current director and his wife, the musical director and his wife (the accompanist) so I hanged around them for awhile; they’re a fun bunch.

After the award ceremony, I went to dinner with my boyfriend and the Grumich family, close friends of Ryan’s and, through him, friends of mine as well. They are a theatre family so they were very interested in the how the event had gone and the program from the show made the rounds during dinner. 

When I finally got home I realized how much my feet were aching and I slipped out of the gorgeous dress and went right to bed; a quick ending to a lovely day.

In other news, Chess (the musical) goes up at the end of this month and I’m in that nervous sort of mindset. I always do this but usually the show comes together near the end and everything turns out peachy. Though, I still don’t believe I was meant for this show or part. I’m an actor who can get by with the occasional song, especially if it’s funny. You see, that way the audience is so busy laughing that they don’t have time to think “wow, she sounds terrible…this is embarrassing.” Unfortunately, Chess consists of a story that is mainly told through song so needless to say, I’m even more nervous that I normally get in the weeks before opening night. However, I’ve talked to my directors and they both seem confident that I’ll be fine. ..I still don’t know.

I’m starting up voice lessons with a new instructor. He and his wife are evidently very good and what’s more, he’s not asking a lot in the way of compensation. When I made a comment about this he said, “I’m not looking to getting rich off this, my wife and I just like to help people who want to improve.” Sounds like my kind of people.

Also, I will be appearing in the next BlackBookBerry episodes, they are being shot this Thursday so I’m really looking forward to that. One of my costume designer friends had a magenta gothic dress that she let me borrow for the first shoot (it was canceled because the photographer’s day job was having complications). I need to go over my notes that I made on my character so I can get back in her mind before the shoot.

Good news! It’s slightly strange too I think since the reactions I get when I tell people usually consist of blank stares and then laughter – I was cast as “Donna” in Debbie Does Dallas: The Musical. I think it’s going to be an incredibly fun show that doesn’t really require singing ability despite it being a musical. I told a lot of people yesterday and it seemed that most of them were at least interested in hearing more so I’m hoping that our audiences will be large.

I wasn’t sure if I would be getting the part or not even though Bob (the director) had originally come to me about a year and a half ago with news about the show and the part he was considering me for. I did make a slight mistake though. See, in an attempt to look “high-school-ish” I had a completely clean face, no make-up whatsoever (which is strange for me) and a nice, summer dress the color of a string-bean that had fallen in the dirt. I went to the audition and showed up about an hour early for my audition. I walked down the sunny stone steps and immediately saw Bob and Heather Tucker sitting on a bench, the former smoking a cigarette while the other was busy texting someone on her cell-phone. Turns out that they had some cancellations or “no-shows” and I sat awhile with them, enjoying the weather from the comfort of the cool shade.

After awhile Bob finished his cigarette and, coming out of his daydream, asked if I wanted to just do my audition since I was there and no one else was. So I went and did my stuff, performing my monologue and singing the 32 bars of my song. When I was finished, I went back into the lobby and talked with Heather for awhile (she seems to run every audition I show up at these days) and we gabbed for awhile. Bob came out and joined in – soon making the comment that it was so strange to me without make-up on and that he was expecting me to wear gothic looking make-up for the character I was being considered for. So, I was frustrated at myself for making such a mistake and went to callbacks the next day with my normal (though I’m not sure if it could be considered “gothic”) make-up on.

The callbacks were fairly normal, not as many people there as I expected but I believe the cast we ended up with is going to be fabulous. I still have the dance combo memorized from the callbacks and I got a message from the director a couple weeks ago saying that we girls were going to get our cheerleading outfits and learn more of the dance for a promo video. I’m really excited; it’s going to be fun playing around and being “bad” again. ;) 

 "Rawr!"

The Reefer, the Post & the Wardrobe

Quite a few things have happened since last I posted. I get so caught up in life that I forget to write it down after it happens but I suppose that's good thing.

The Reefer Madness show went up on 4/20 and was reprised on 4/21 but sadly I was not a part of it. For personal reasons I was forced to drop out which is something I have never done before in my life. I still very upset about it but I know I must get over it and move on. I must learn from my experience and just not make a habit of bowing out of shows. Of course, two years ago when I was in the Rocky Horror Show, I experienced another first - I let an illness keep me from performing the second week of the show. I came down with a horrible case of the Swine Flu and couldn't move off the couch for a week and two days. I had a horrible rash from my constant habitation of the couch and I didn't even realize it until I came back from the final performance on Halloween and a fellow cast member said something (she did it in a way that sounded catty and made me feel really uncomfortable but oh well).

I recently turned down an offer to be in the ensemble for the show "Annie" and I also feel bad about that. I put down on my application that I would accept any role and then changed my mind before I was contacted by the director. Not a good thing to do but I couldn't change how I felt and explained to the director as best I could that while I was extremely flattered to be asked to be part of his production, I wanted to try my luck at a few other auditions. I apologized a few times in the email, hoping that he would understand or at least forgive me in time. He said in reply that he was disappointed but that he understood. I hope he does.

In other news, I was just signed by a talent agency in St. Louis - Now Talent - and I have a really good feeling about it. I had the orientation meeting last weekend and have a lot of things to do. It's a non-exclusive agency and they're very down to earth and reasonable.

Also, the video I was in (Pokemon Pals) on Youtube has gotten over 5,000 views - I'm pretty happy about this even though I'm not much of a fan of the actual video.



It was a fun experience though I understand now why celebrities more than likely don't frequent online message boards or read gossip/comments about them. Some of the viewers left comments that made me realize I need thicker skin.

The St. Louis Post Dispatch just did an article on the BlackBookBerry series that I was cast in. I'm extremely happy and excited.

IT guys reboot comedy with 'BlackBookBerry'

 March 26, 2011--- Left, Elizabeth Graveman performs an improvisation routine as she tries out for the fourth season of BlackBookBerry a St. Louis comedy troupe which acts out office-themed sketches for an online show. The show is casting four new roles. Also pictured are cast members Heather Schlitt, center, and Mary Schnure, right. Emily Rasinski erasinski@post-dispatch.com

"Elizabeth Graveman, 24, seemed to win over the room right away when the Lindenwood University acting grad spoke about her fondness for the Marx Brothers, Laurel & Hardy and the Three Stooges. Her monologue — Diane from "Cheers" — was flawless, and her scene-reading had some laugh-out-loud moments. She sealed the deal with her response to Briggs' inquiry about whether she had any comedic limits. "Comedy is comedy," Graveman said. "I'm not afraid of touching people. I don't have a problem saying anything."

Several days later, Jennings and Graveman accepted invitations to join the "BlackBookBerry" cast.

Now if only my day job could be better...

I will also be attending my first Arts for Life Awards Banquet in the next month. Grand Hotel: The Musical was nominated for "Large Ensemble." Ryan was nominated for his character in "Grand Hotel" (Otto Kringelein) as well as his character in "The Producers" (Carmen Ghia).

While I wasn't nominated for my character, I had a really good time with the show and stepping into a role that the almighty Garbo had played. I'm just happy to cheer on everyone else.

Elizaveta Grushinskaya & Baron Felix von Gaigern

In my spare time, I'm in need of spring/summer clothes so I will be making the rounds at various Goodwills and other cheap stores where you can find amazing things. I must also make plans to go through my closet and keep what I wear and donate what I don't because the hangers are lining the closet, wall to wall but I don't wear a lot of those things. Plus, I'm tired of wearing the same old dresses when I go out on dates with Ryan. I love getting dressed up for him but I'm having a hard time getting excited about it since I wear the same dresses over and over again and he says he was just joking but he made a comment about how he doesn't like me in jeans. So, I try to stick to dresses.

Here's hoping my summer is packed with good theatre, good friends and great feelings.

Grin and *Bare* It : Healthy Actors are Happy Actors

You know how something is easier said than done? Whether it be getting to bed at an earlier time, eating healthier, keeping stress to a minimum, finding a new job or saving up a nice nest egg instead of squandering your pay, making the change in your life is the hard part. They say it takes 21 days to make something a habit but what if you can't even make it past day 3?

As an actor, it's very important to be healthy and well rested, ready to work and use up incredible amounts of energy. The impossibly long dance numbers, the mental anguish that you can inflict upon yourself, both as the character and as yourself if you feel you're not good enough or where you should be. It's a very draining profession. I've met other actors before, sometimes in the same cast who go out drinking every night and not getting enough sleep and I just think, "How in the world is that even possible?"

Get enough rest by going to bed before midnight (or even eleven).

On stage, it's hard to stay in the moment when you're yawning every few seconds. It also takes everyone else out of the moment and might even cause an epidemic. Pretty soon you have a bunch of tired actors on stage, the pace falls flat and everyone is mad at the one who started it. The energy that is required of an actor can be a bit on the extreme side depending on the physical and emotional/mental demands of the character they are playing. This isn't to say that if you're character doesn't move much and isn't as physically demanding as some of the others, you can eat a box of Oreos for breakfast and create a pyramid out of Mountain Dew cans. Just going through the motions of a theatre person can be stressful and exhausting, for example, the dreaded tech week. The week before the opening of a show can be ridiculously grueling depending on factors like the director, the show type, technical aspects and how far along the cast has come but once you make it through those experiences, you feel as though you could withstand anything. However, tech week is anything but easy peasy.
 

Attempt to diminish the stress in your life.

Personally, I have a tendency to sleep walk (while conscious, which is evidently not very well known...) due to the stress that the shows puts on me but also the stress I put on myself. An example of my odd behavior would be something like this:

I'm in my room, I know it's my room. Yet, I'm behaving like I'm in the theatre (either the greenroom, the wings, the dressing room or some such place but never the stage or the house). I have cast members in my room, running through lines, walking around my bed (yes, it's still there as is the other furniture) and I usually will feel like I can't go to sleep. I would never allow myself to go to sleep while rehearsing - that's work/play time. So, I'll either be sitting up in bed or walking around, ready to go on with a scene but really just wanting to go to bed. Finally, I either snap out of it myself or say "Screw it, it's 3:34AM! I'm going to bed, guys." This last bit is usually set with a whine rather than anger. 

I also have been in bed only to hear my cue and, freaking out since I'm not dressed and I have no contacts in, will proceed to put jeans and a shirt on and have even put my contacts in before realizing what I was doing. What's really infuriating is, I can hear them, my cast members, repeating my cue and improv-ing poorly or sometimes just a dead silence and I can't find the stage! So I'm trying to find it, I've gone through the closet before, out into the hallway and attempted to go through a wall once but all to no avail.
I spoke to a man once about my condition and he termed it "Dream Walking," a meshing of both worlds, almost. The real world (in which my bedroom lives) and the other world (or main world in my book where the theatre is) decide to fight each other for my attention. Since, I don't know much on the subject, I'm thinking about seeing a sleep specialist or group in a college for more information.


Eating healthier naturally makes you feel happier and gives you more energy but it also has other perks. I'm doing Reefer Madness: The Musical right now and this show will involve skimpy costumes and heavy petting amongst cast members. I'm exercising and toning up for this but it's in a couple weeks and I'm hoping some results start showing as soon as possible. 

Me in The Rocky Horror Show (2009)

Though I'm having some issues with Reefer Madness. See, we have less than two weeks until we go up but rehearsals keep getting canceled. We have only choreographed one dance number and it's mostly improv. Our music director had to drop out because he had a family crisis (a legit excuse, of course) but I have this bad feeling that a lot of other people involved in the show don't seem to care. People show up late to rehearsals, the time will get knocked back from 4PM to 5PM and then it's 6PM and we still haven't started. I don't mean to sound a stick in the mud but I want to make sure the show is good, or at least decent...And the director seemed so excited about the show and all of the sponsors. I don't know, I knew this was just going to be a "fun" show without a lot of deeper character development or anything but I wasn't counting on worrying about the show. This is just adding to the stress.

I did, however, just get cast in a St. Louis based webseries, BlackBookBerry. 

http://www.blackbookberry.net/ 

And the director of the series and I have been having interesting conversations about my character. I'm really looking forward to stepping into her shoes.

Also, I have another webseries (just one episode) coming up this week. It's a live-action Pokemon series which I admit, made me a little skeptical about participating in it but that was before I read the episode script. I think it will be a fun experience and another way to try and get my face out there.

I have a few other auditions coming up. "Annie" and "Chess" so they're both musicals which means that I won't get my hopes up too high. See, when it comes to singing, I can get by, especially if it's a funny song. But I have long since realized that it, along with dancing, is not my forte. My strengths are acting and comedy so I try to use those to my advantage whenever possible. However, I still enjoy doing musicals and would be happy to be cast in one of them.

Other than that, I'm just looking for more opportunities. I just want my life to be happy. Of course, I understand that every life has it's ups and downs but I want to be able to enjoy what little time (in the scheme of things) that I have here on this planet, in this reality. 

If reincarnation exists and I'm made to come back, I hope it's as a kangaroo, a giraffe, a bat, an owl or a sloth but I want to make this life memorable. I want to do what I love and be happy for the most part and with my entertainment aspiration, I would make other people happy as well, but mainly I need to succeed because
 when it comes right down to it, I don't want to settle for anything else.

"Millions of people happy..."

So, that's what is going on in life. Lots of projects (and stress) but it's fun and hopefully it's just the start to something even bigger.

"Life's like a movie, write your own ending.

 Keep believing, keep pretending. 

 We've done just what we set out to do.

 Thanks to the lovers, the dreamers, and you."

Two Auditions & Frostbitten Toes

I had a busy day of auditions and got back a few hours ago, only to wrap myself up in the warmth of my bed covers. Audition number one was at 2PM, for the popular webseries, "BlackBookBerry." I left really early since they were predicting snow (I believe flakes are still falling right now) and got there about 40 minutes before my audition. Since I had the time, I did tongue and mouth exercises in the car and sang along with Wakko, listing off the states and their capitals in order to loosen up and enunciate better.

I always sing along with the "Animaniacs" before an audition because the "State Capitals," "The Presidents," "The Senses," and the "Cartoon Individual" songs are fantastic to warm up with. I still need to work on memorizing all of the nations of the world but I have a good many of them committed to memory so I can keep up with Yakko somewhat. I have done my tongue exercises while driving down the highway before but I try not to do them in line at a stop light; people tend to stare at you when your stretching your tongue past your chin, a la Gene Simmons. If only you didn't have the window glass separating you or else you could use the excuse that most of us utilize, "It's okay, I'm an actor!"

 "It's okay! I'm a limo driver!"
~~~~~~~~~

Anyway, so I arrived at my audition earlier, did my warm ups, gathered together my headshots/resumes and my purse and went inside. It was eerily silent and empty looking but papers were posted to various walls saying "BlackBookBerry Audition" and then an arrow indicating that I was in the right place and to keep going. Looking back it was like Dorothy walking down the hall on her way to see the Great and Powerful Oz but this time unaccompanied by her posse of misfits. The first hall was drab white coupled with a gray concrete floor and it led to an old looking stairwell. Well, the papers said to keep going so I did though I must admit that I was on my guard just in case. It was a legit series that I was auditioning for since I knew some friends who had worked on the project before and vouched for the cast/crew. Plus, I have watched episodes of the show on Youtube. Still, a girl can never be TOO careful and I approached the door at the top of the stairs with some care.

Once I opened the door, I really started wondering because the lights were off in the hall but further down I could see the rest was illuminated. So, I slowly walked toward the light, listening intently. (I don't mean to make it sound overly dramatic or anything but I read about murderers and serial killers all the time out of morbid curiosity and like to think I have learned from the mistakes those other girls made and as I said before, a girl can never be TOO careful). At the end of the hall I saw another paper advertising the audition and asking prospects to wait in the adjacent room. I could hear both male and female voices in the room where the auditions were being held so I felt instantly relaxed and plunked my stuff down in the room that the paper alluded to. A man was in the bathroom, cleaning, and he came out and saw me and went in to tell the others I was there.

Some people came out to greet me (I was the only "prospect" at the time so the "green room" was empty aside from myself) and they said the people from Post Dispatch were there, interviewing them about the series. I was still incredibly early so I just chilled in the room and did some stretches to limber and loosen the rest of me. While I was doing a particular leg stretch, close to the ground, I looked over and noticed a squished cockroach and quickly looked to see if there were any live ones around. A couple friends who were working on the project, came out to say hi, talk and hand me my side to cold read for the audition. Then, before I knew it, I was told to come on in.

There were about 5 people there who were watching the auditions, in a semi circle, a human-made apron of this cozy stage. One girl was filming while the director sat in front of me, a laptop computer resting on the table in front of him. The screen was facing me which I thought was weird but didn't really question it. 2 others were on the right of me (I didn't count them in the 5 because they were both from the Post and kept snapping pictures as I was auditioning). Everyone was very welcoming and friendly, introducing themselves before beginning the audition and asking me about myself. Before we began, the director at the head of the table asked if someone could see me. "Yeah, I can," came a man's voice from the laptop. So, I kept referring to him as "Voice" or "Computer" all through the audition.

The audition went like this - 1 min. comedic monologue, 4 or 5 cold reads (scenes from Arrested Development and The Guild) and then a short improv. I haven't done improv in about a year or more so I feel really rusty about it but I think the cold reads went well. I think I could have done better at my monologue (and did during my second audition where I used the same one). I feel that even if I don't get cast, it was not only important for me to get more experience at auditioning for film but also to meet new people. I feel I met some great people today.

So while I'm there, it started snowing..and it kept getting heavier as I was waiting to be seen. So, when I left, people were driving somewhat bad and slush was piling up in the streets. Thankfully, my second audition for the "Now Talent" modeling/acting agency was at 5:15 because I needed to get from downtown St. Louis to Historic St. Charles with the weather behaving the way it was.

I got there with plenty of time to spare, even stopping in a few shops on Main Street before heading over. I was about an hour early but they must have had some cancellations or no-shows because I got in almost after I signed in. I had a make-shift model portfolio, 2 headshots/resumes and my monologue in my head, all ready to go. They also had me pick up a couple commercial cold reads and I groaned inside because commercials are a weakness of mine. I hate cheesiness and can't seem to get myself excited over Revlon nail color or roach bombs. A 6th grade girl went in before me and had the cheerful, if not somewhat brainless, ability to deliver her commercial sides with cloying sweetness.

So, I went in and the two women behind the table were young, pretty, and incredibly nice and welcoming. (Nothing kills the audition mood like a mean, unfriendly director). I whipped out my excuse for a modeling portfolio, my headshots/resumes and all that jazz and they took a look at the photos. I dumped the rest of my things on the sidelines and then they asked if I had a monologue. Of course, I have numerous ones in my head for any given audition but I went with my ol' faithful for right now (a monologue that Carla/Rhea Perlman performs in the Cheers television show) and felt much better about it that time around. They women seemed to really like it too because they laughed at parts of it and I could feel myself feeding off of their energy, enthusiasm and interest in what I was saying, while still keeping true to the character/monologue. After that, we chatted briefly while I gathered my things and then headed back out into the snow.

One of the shots that seems to get attention

~~~~~~~~~~

So, now I'm home and, after having sat in front of the space heater slowly regaining the feeling in my frostbitten feet, I'm in bed with "Harpo Speaks!" and finishing off this post. It was a doozy but, what are you gonna do. I'm grateful for the day I've had and, while I hope to be contacted by the "directors" with good news, I'm happy to chalk the day up to experience.

"Goodbye, Elizabeth."

"Goodbye, Computer."

Well, That's Over...Now What?

Well, The Heiress at Kirkwood Theatre Guild has opened and closed without a hitch and the audience loved it. Okay, that's a bit of a lie - little things and "oops" happened here and there but what show doesn't have those? The lantern that I used all through tech week ended up breaking on opening night so that was annoying and the base of the stairwell was made of plaster so it couldn't be drilled into the set or else it would crumble. Unfortunately, none of us thought to tie it down and the male lead hit it on opening night so that it almost crashed onto the floor and I knocked it on the second night. I heard it wobbling behind me and the audience was giggling so I put my hand out behind me to steady it as I went on with my lines. The thought of milking it came to mind but I thought better of it and carried on.

 My cast/crew family of The Heiress

So, I ended up getting through it after months of putting myself down and feeling like I just didn't "have" my character. I must say, I'm a little depressed actually. The show really started growing on me by opening night. Of course, it could be due to this:

Money can't buy love 

Written by: Bob Wilcox

"Any young woman who takes on the role of Catherine Sloper deserves credit simply for being willing to do it. Catherine is the central character in The Heiress, Ruth and Augustus Goetz's dramatization of Henry James's novella Washington Square. She is regularly described, especially by her father, as plain and painfully shy.

Sara Strawhun makes herself all of that as Catherine in the Kirkwood Theatre Guild production of the play, though I would guess, from her lively appearance in the curtain call, that Strawhun is actually a quite attractive young woman. But as Catherine, she wears geeky glasses (if that term may be applied to 1850), her eyebrows appear to have been thickened, and she can barely raise her eyes and speak to anyone outside the immediate family.

The playwrights do give her a moment with her shallow aunt – Deborah Dennert finds every morsel of fun in this character – when she delightfully structures her account of an amusing incident in her day. But when she attempts to tell it to her father, of whom she is not just wary but nearly terrified, she loses the wit in her telling, and it falls flat. As does just about everything she says.

Catherine does, eventually, find the courage to tell her father what she thinks of him and of the miserable life she has. It's probably more melodramatic than anything in Henry James (I confess I haven't read his piece), but it's dramatically satisfying, though on the level that the play, unfortunately, holds to throughout.

Richard Hunsaker tries to introduce some lovable moments into his portrait of the father, but he's stuck playing a very unpleasant individual, and the result is that he comes off most of the time as a well-done caricature and very close to the villain of a melodrama.

The other villain in The Heiress is Morris Townsend. Jake Bantel is as handsome as Morris must be and as smooth and pleasant – so much so that you almost wish he weren't a fortune-hunter and really did want to make Catherine happy.

Morris finds his way into the Sloper household by way of a cousin, played by JD Wade, who is marrying Catherine's cousin, played by Jessica Lyle. She is the daughter of another sister of the doctor, a firm and sensible matron in Jan Niehoff's performance. Betsy Gasoske shrewdly handles her brief turn as Morris's sister, called in as a not-entirely-satisfactory character witness for the young man.

Answering the door, bringing the sherry, generally keeping the household running is Elizabeth Graveman as the maid. On the basis of her four performances that I've seen, I can say that she brightens any production she graces, and I eagerly look forward to one that gives her a leading role.

Well-crafted, realistic sets are the rule at the Kirkwood Theatre Guild, so I was surprised to see Jan Meyer and Gary Sibbitts' set for The Heiress surrounded by black drapes. But with large set pieces – windows, a fireplace, a grandfather's clock, a stairway – placed within the drapes, it worked beautifully. Lee Meyer did the lights, Cherol Thibaut the period costumes, and Joe Arno the sound – a crucial element in this play, well cued by stage manger Rebeca Davidson. The assured and experienced directing hand of Jan Meyer guided the production."

So, I have closed The Heiress and am already experiencing the classic "now what" feeling. It's more noticeable this time since I went from September to now, hopping through three shows without a pause. There are a few auditions on the horizon that I will attend in hopes of entering the theatre as soon as possible.

 Sneaking a peek at the letter the Doctor wants me to deliver.
~~~~~~

It's funny, really. It's very much a love/hate relationship, the heartbreaking rejections, the stressful rehearsal processes, the sleep-walking that I, personally, experience and the lack of sleep due to this. The deep and stabbing frustration one suffers when they feel they don't "have" the character, and the constant depression, the self-deprecation because you feel you should be better at this. On the other hand, you have the feeling the theatre gives you, merely upon entrance. The smell of the set being made, the familiar faces of your cast/crew mates, your family for only a few months but completely unforgettable. The warm glow of the dressing room lights, being measured for costumes and going through the motions with your head held high, the feeling of satisfaction while doing this, the feeling that you know EVERYTHING and that this place is your home. The moment you step out on stage, peering into the empty seats but feeling the audience there anyway. Taking direction from your director, the laughter that they give you in return and the mental notes you take on where the laugh lines will be. Trying something new each time on stage, experimenting and playing around while still taking it seriously and naturally, the applause at the end when you drop character and stand in front of a great number of people and take that bow. In the end, the pros outweigh the cons and most of the time, the cons themselves are things we just can't live without.

Yes, I feel I'm already experiencing withdraw. But I have submitted my photos and resume to a talent agency for a casting call that they are holding. I do hope I hear back from them but I plan to still submit my things to other agents as well. The problem is, I'm in St. Louis, Missouri. There isn't much in the way of theatre, films or agents in this area. More and more I find myself thinking of visiting California for pilot season. Now that I have a full-time job, I have the means of obtaining the money. I hope I'm not scared. Even if I am, I can't give into it.

I got a facial today in an attempt to shrink the pores before my next photo shoot. The woman was very nice but she kept telling me that I need to start wearing an anti-wrinkle creme and that my neck and underneath my chin showed signs of aging already....while I understand why she told me, so as to warn me, it's not what I want to hear right now. I'll be 24 at the end of this month.

I've worked in community theatre shows with them before, the older people who gaze upon the usually smallish set with sadness and exclaim, "I used to do theatre when I was in high school. I had dreams of going along with it..." Then they usually stop there and come back to the world but the damage has been done. Just by their mentioning it, they remember old dreams and hopes, re-evaluating their lives now AND they have freaked out the younger actors around them while at it. I don't want that to happen..I MUST do what I can to do this for a living. And in order to achieve this, I need to stop lollygagging, stop messing around and get down to business. I mean, how do I expect to have the life I dream of if I don't do anything about it? Surely, what happened to Lana Turner doesn't happen anymore.

So, I now have a few things to work on, places to go, groups to join, auditions to attend, phone calls to make, and things to learn. Even if if doesn't pay off, even if nothing comes of it, at least I'll have tried instead of giving it up like those people who revisit their theatre days every now and then and say, "I could have..."

How could professionals like these give up?

The Heiress, the Boy, and the New Job

Well, I have been in 2 shows since the last time I clicked "Publish Post" those few months ago. I was "Edith," the not all quite there, incredibly speedy, Cockney maid in Blithe Spirit. Then came the uptight, embezzling bitch, "Trish Hammers," in Reckless. Now I am playing "Maria" in The Heiress, a maid again, only this time I don't run and ...well, there aren't very many laughs. It's incredibly noticeable since the last two shows were comedies. It's fine, I love a good drama but it definitely means that I have to work hard. I guess I should be lucky, comedy always came so easy to me. I never quite understood when I would hear people whine and complain or even gasp in dread, saying that comedy was terribly hard, some people even throwing in the towel before trying it.

My dramatic characters are very subtle, controlled even. Calculating and cold like Medea or the Marquis de Merteuil (two of my favorite dramatic characters). Those are the ones I am good at.

It's because I don't blow up at every little thing in my real life and, perhaps, that is a problem since I feel I'm too controlled when it comes to dramatic stage characters. In fact, my current director even commented on this after a particular rehearsal. So since then I've been tearing myself apart practically, trying to find out what I could do to be this character, this other woman. I've yelled about it, cried about it and eventually just went to bed to sleep on it but all to no avail. Yet, I'm not giving up, I just won't let myself. A theatre friend of mine suggested that in order to get past the "controlled" me, I should take up improv again. I do believe he may be onto something. I haven't done improv in a while and have been really wanting to get back into it.

Today's rehearsal was just so-so for me, but since I'm in this bad place with my character, they all tend to be so-so. Today I incorporated more comedy into some lines and yes, I'm happy they got laughs and yes, I know that not all drama is purely serious but I feel like it's an easy out for me to get some laughs when I should be trying harder to understand the seriousness of my part, her life and what she has to gain/lose.
So that's what's been going on in theatre world for me. I have a few auditions lined up for more shows (most of them are comedies or musicals that have at least one part for a woman who doesn't sing at all or is a character singer).

In the winter I was also in a short film called "Frostbitten" directed by Timothy Ryan Becker. It was a comedic, silent film that was a lot of fun to shoot even though it was freezing outside at the time. I'm hoping to work with Timothy some more for his upcoming projects.

I also modeled for a photography class just recently in which the four gentlemen who were in the class got to spend the whole class period positioning me and taking photos. Two of them have sent me plenty of great photos from the experience and I'm waiting on the other two as well as the teacher (she grabbed her camera too) still. Compensation was just enough to fill my gas tank but I'm not complaining, it was a fun night. I'm planning to head to a couple agencies in St. Louis soon and I might be using one or two of those photos in my portfolio.

 One of my favorite shots from the photography class. I think it looks kind of Joan Crawford-ish

I recently was hired by a marketing company in Earth City, MO called Schmitt ProfiTools which was a wonderful turn of events since I had been out of work since October. It's a 9-5 desk job chock full of computer data entry pages, spreadsheets, chair adjustments, stretches, animal crackers from the kitchen, and running up and down stairs when you have random bursts of energy. Since I'm not used to sitting at a desk for so long, every single day, I feel like I need to move constantly. I'm thinking I should get up early, work out and then go to work but I have a feeling that won't ever happen, I love sleep too much. Though I will be signing up for a membership at Gold's Gym this week. I need to keep in shape.

My fella is doing very well too, though just as tired, if not more so. He's in a show right now called Miss LonelyHearts at his university, Fontbonne. I'm going to go see it on their final dress rehearsal since it goes up the same weekend mine goes up. I'm so happy because I get to see him later this week, though it seems I just can't get enough of seeing him. To say that he's going to be great in a show is definitely a safe bet. He has stolen many a show, it seems to come so naturally to him. I'm envious in a way, though in a state of "awe" rather than jealously. Like studying a great master.

I was driving in the car earlier today and thinking (instead of concentrating on the road) about my dearest and then wondered to myself, "What did I used to think of before I met him..? Did my mind expand and is now holding more thoughts or did these thoughts (concerning this new person in my life) write over some of the old thoughts?" I'm sure it sounds completely ridiculous but at the time it really had me wondering. Of course, I was incredibly tired at the time too.

Until next time, I need to seriously get more sleep, drink more water and move around more.

What will happen in the coming days? Will I finally find my inner Maria and feel much more at ease with "The Heiress"? Will I become fat and lazy due to my dormant position at my new place of employment? Will the boyfriend find out that he's annoyed by me and tell me to hit the road (he had better not if he knows what's good for him)?

Tune in next time to find out!

Same bat time,
Same bat channel

~BOO

The Curse of the Straight Man

No, not “straight man” as in heterosexual but a type of performer in a double act. The term straight man has been around since the vaudeville days and has been used to describe one half of a comedic duo, the one who makes “zingers” so easily, who rolls his eyes and flatly delivers sarcastic comments about the other performer in the team. He is sometimes portrayed as serious and down to earth, intelligent and reasonable. Some great “straight men” include Jack Benny, Oliver Hardy, Bud Abbott, George Burns, Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle, Sonny Bono, Dean Martin, Dudley Moore, Dick Smothers, and Jon Stewart.

The curse of the “straight man” is that he/she is not thought of to be the funny one. They are foils for the “comic,” the wild and hyper one – yet the comedy wouldn’t exist without the straight men. They set up the jokes and have to be damn good at knowing exactly when to pause, how long to keep the pause, know how to listen to the other person, make readable facial expressions to get the point across without saying a word, and most of all – to keep a straight face. Sometimes the almighty Jack Benny would crack up on screen but c’mon, it’s Jack Benny. He was allowed to do anything. George Burns would talk to the audience directly (breaking the 4th wall is a bit of a no-no if you are anyone other than George Burns or Jack Benny).

The Classic Jack Benny “Straight Man” Stance  

One of the few cases I can think of where the straight man had more notoriety than the bungling comic is with George and Gracie. Not too many people remember Gracie whereas most (not members of the younger generation unfortunately) know who George Burns is. The classic, iconic cigar, circular rimmed glasses and the white hair parted on the side.

 

Burns and Allen – The Straight Man and the Goofball

Let’s face it – a double act just wouldn’t be as funny without the straight guy. That’s why it is downright irritating when people compliment the outrageous, over the top comic, saying he is the funniest person in the world and then looking at the straight man and saying something like “How do you keep a straight face when he’s so darn funny!” or “Why aren’t you funny like this guy?” Of course, if you are a female, it’s even worse. One reason being a comedienne is worse is because people have this silly idea in their heads that women can’t be funny. Think about it. How many female comediennes can you name right off the top of your head?

1. Lucille Ball
2. Carol Burnett
3. Imogen Coca
4. Mae West
5. Madeline Kahn
6. Gilda Radner
7. Cheri O’Teri
8. Molly Shannon
9. Virginia O’Brien (one of my favorites)
10. Gracie Allen
11. Marilyn Monroe (she was not as stupid as they made it in films)
12. Thelma Todd (Straight man to Groucho in a few scenes in a couple films)
13. Shelly Long
14. Rhea Perlman
15. Bebe Neuwirth
16. Marion Davies
17. Marie Dressler
18. Terri Garr
19. Ellen
20. Roseanne

Carol Burnett – One of the Greatest Comediennes of All Time – as Starlett O’Hara in the Classic “Went With The Wind” Sketch. Harvey Korman played “Rat Butler.”

….ok, I can’t spew out anymore without thinking about it and searching my mental database of names. To make it even worse, if your an attractive girl you receive comments like these, “You are so beautiful, you should go into modeling,” or when your comic is standing near you, you might hear this “You two are so different! He’s hilarious and you’re so gorgeous!” This can be so frustrating, especially if it is delivered to you right after a show and received tons of laughs and applause. Not that being pretty is a bad thing but it is when that’s all people can say about you. It’s not as if it’s a skill or anything and guess what? It won’t be around forever.

But the best feeling in the world is the laughter, followed quickly by the sound of applause. It is truly an intoxicating feeling. Of course, like the character of the straight man, changes can occur. For instance, Stan and Ollie can switch from time to time – the straight man and the comic can be transferred just as women can be serious in one film and funny in another like Barbra Streisand in Funny Girl, Hello Dolly! and Meet The Fockers, yet I wouldn’t classify her as a comedienne. Carolyn Jones is another example of a woman actor who did both serious (at the time – Invasion of the Body Snatchers appears as more of a comedy these days) and comedic roles like Morticia Addams in the 1960′s television show, “The Addams Family.” Personally, I look up to these female actors more since they aren’t one trick ponies. It’s just too bad that people can’t seem to remember their funny stuff. I know I’m a good straight man, I have confidence in that, but I know I have the energy for the comedic goofball as well. For example, while I am told that I make a great straight man, I played the part of the Mayor’s Wife in “Bye Bye Birdie” (a character who doesn’t speak one word and only yells one line in a song and yet I got the biggest applause for facial expressions and timing) and a dramatic duchess in a Madrigal production in which I relied heavily on improv, facial expressions, and sometimes an impersonation of Gloria Swanson in Sunset Blvd. All in all, I like classifying (and working hard to become better) myself as a character actor. The thing is I do and say whatever I find funny and usually other people around me find it funny too. It’s a perk.

You may have noticed that I did not include Sarah Silverman or any of the ridiculous women “comediennes” of the present in my list. I can explain this very simply – I just don’t think they are funny. I believe they are only in the public eye for shock value, because they have vocabularies that would make a sailor blush or because their “material” centers around the human anatomy or sexual acts.

In the words of the great Groucho Marx, "Anybody can say something dirty and get a laugh. But saying something clean and getting a laugh. That requires a comedian."

 

Tim Conway (goof) and Harvey Korman (straight man) in the Classic Dentist Sketch

Now, I’m not at all trying to discredit the goofballs, the clowns, the really loud and obnoxious ones. They are funny too – they are the other half to the formula that is comedy. But I believe it’s time we give the straight men out there the respect they rightfully deserve. And remember this – never, EVER assume that a straight man could never be the goofball. He/She just may surprise you.